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Monday Big Words Print Issue Update: Week 8 on Stands w/Hidden Shamrock/Michael Bly review/Week 7 Right Here!

January 8, 2007

Allrighty then!

A lot can happen in one day!  My anthology partner in crime Alycia Ripley has been schmoozing up a storm today and it looks like the Just Buffalo project will be catching a lot of ink in a lot of papers very soon.  I also spoke to an editor at A Big Local Paper today regarding writing some of their bar and club reviews and I’m going to be doing a test bar review for them this Thursday.  Wanna know where?  I’m not telling you that.

     Night Life magazine is in the process of overhauling their databases and layout and they are slowly starting to improve the overall look, feel, layout and professionalism of the paper, which is great news for everybody.  The new print issue is out today with my bombshell on unemployment, ‘Eight Simple Rules For Doing Something With Your Life’.  If that one doesn’t piss some people off and make a few waves, then I’ll eat my flat hat.  They also ran ‘Like A Bridge Over Drunken Waters’, my bar review on Michael Bly and The Hidden Shamrock out in Depew. 

     Below you’ll find last week’s Big Words I Know By Heart Column on the promise that the New Year holds for myself along with the conflicting resolutions I have, ‘Auld Lang Syne’.  I should be updating fairly frequently throughout the week as there is a LOT going on and I don’t want to leave you in the lurch.  Enjoy,

Tom Waters

Auld Lang Syne

The New Year is approaching, the calendar is rolling back to the starting position for another year, and I can’t help but take stock of my life and make hollow resolutions that I will most likely fail miserably on. January leaves me optimistic, looking forward to 2007 as a time of productivity, promotion and new frontiers. 2006 was not my best year. I spent ten months in a crippling depression with accompanying writers’ block and it wasn’t until October that I snapped out of it and got back into the swing of things. When I did though, I was back up to speed and then some.

From October through December, I managed to launch a new weekly column, put the finishing touches on my next book (If They Can’t Take a Joke), complete writing my fifth book (Slapstick & Superego), successfully uproot and move my fan site from Blogger to WordPress (www.tomfoolery4.wordpress.com), speak with and negotiate a new sister site with more of a focus on local and community events (Big Buffalo I Know By Heart), launch a merchandise site with an exclusive book that can’t be purchased anywhere else (Café Press and Clean Up After Me, I’m Irish, respectively) and continued to work on a mammoth project for a poetry collection while teaming up with a fellow local writer to flesh out plans for a Buffalo Anthology with proceeds going to the Just Buffalo Literary Center. Luckily, I got caught up, and with the way things are looking, I’m going into 2007 with all pistons firing.

My resolutions are the same with varying results every year: make more money, save more money and lose some weight. Last year, I lost ten pounds only to have it find it’s way back sometime over the summer. I’m starting to get comfortable with being moderately overweight as I’m in a relationship and I am in the first phase of my 30’s. Who do I have to impress? For the sake of my health though, and since I’ll be doing an exhaustive promotional junket from April til June or July for the new book, I’d really like to lose 15-25 pounds and keep it off so that I’m not dead on my heels by August.

I was doing okay with saving money well into July until my girlfriend ran into a financial snag and I started picking up some of the tabs around the house with groceries and such and went into financial lockdown. After two months of that, I snapped and started spending lavish amounts of money. Then when I snapped out of my depression, I really started spending money. Nothing says ’Charge it!’ like mania on the other scale of bipolar disorder, but I’ve still kept it within reason. Oh, and I bought and financed the ultimate HDTV setup that I’ve been lusting after for the last three years, so that’s not going to be cheap. I like my toys. My solution to saving money has always been to make more, and that battle plan has served me well over the years. I’m awful at saving money, but I operate under the theory that my literary ship will come in at some point in my lifetime and wipe the slate clean. Make no mistake, I’m not hurting for cash and my credit is better than 70% of the people out there, but it could always be better.

So how am I going to lose weight in a lasting manner this year? I’ll try and cut back on ordering out for food at work from three to five days to maybe two days a week. I’ll stop eating fifteen wings when I’m out at a bar at one in the morning two hours before I go to sleep and my metabolism closes shop for the day. I’ll eat a little healthier around the house and get more exercise, and by exercise, I mean laying pipe with the wife more often for my own good. It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it, and aside from swimming, it’s the only form of exercise I condone. I’ll commit and continue to force myself to drink two liters of water a day because it split’s the fat cells and helps to keep you active. I may have to hunker down and drink fruity low carb beers from time to time instead of the light beers that I’ve grown accustomed to in the last three years.

You’ve gotta spend money to save money, so I’m investing a great deal of it in promoting the next book, which will be my first hardcover in over six years. It’s got a high profit margin and I’m in the black after 100 copies, so I need to get past the 100 copy mark and keep promoting. I’m going to beat local booksellers over the head until If They Can’t Take a Joke is on a shelf at every bookstore, outlet, and gas station in a 200 mile radius and beyond. I’ll get a modest to admirable raise at work sometime in the spring and my consolodation loan will end in March. I’ll dump my tax return on the credit card and collect all markers from the wife once her loan expires. I’ll continue to promote the bejesus out of my merchandise site and force myself to save some ducets for a rainy day come summertime. I’ll commit to following through with less than half of these things and still make out all right.

I’ve got other big plans for 2007, but I don’t want to spoil all the surprises or tip my hand too far. I’m getting older and it’s time to get moving. I’m really proud of my weekly column, so I’ll continue to soldier along with that and hopefully build up a faithful base of angry and drunken Buffalonians. For the entire month of April, I’ll be reading short bits from the new book and touring with local award winning bands in groups of three for area concerts. I’d like to break into more papers and bigger radio stations for publication, promotions and appearances. The way I see it, I’m going to be 32 in October and I want to be self employed by 35, spending my days lounging around the house, napping, and writing books while freelancing for local and national publications. Everything is moving in that direction, so I just have to stay the course and stay focused. I’d like to be comfortably wealthy by 37 and own a house by then at the very latest, and somewhere along the line, I’d really like to have two rug rats tearing it up around the house. If I’m not a successful author by 40, I’ll hang it up and start making beads from home for fun and profit or some similar failure. ’06 was a fantastic year, but as a writer, I’m always wondering what’s on the next page, or what the next chapter holds. Pull up your britches, 2007, because I’m comin’ for ya.

Working off my hangover,

Tom ’party favor’ Waters

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