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Monday Update!: Cheap Degenerate in stores, Night Life on stands (?), Hidden Shamrock review right here!

January 15, 2007

     What with the holiday, I’m not sure whether or not the new issue of Night Life is on stands with the current Big Words print column.  This update will have to be a two parter, so I’m giving you part one today with a reprint of last week’s Hidden Shamrock review and you’ll get part two tomorrow.  You follow so far?  All right.  Also, I’m not sure if you’re on the email newsletter list, but Clean Up After Me, I’m Irish: A Cheap Degenerate’s Guide To Buffalo Bars is now available for a cool ten bucks at Don’s Atomic Comics as well as directly from the author, if we’re on a first name basis.  The book is selling like wild fire and supplies at Don’s are limited, so stop in Tuesday or some time this week if you want a copy of the best selling bar guide in the history of Buffalo!  For now, I’ll leave you with the Shamrock review.  I talked to Tom (the owner of the Shamrock) last week and we’ll be doing a huge launch for the Irish book ON St. Patrick’s Day (Saturday the 17th) from six pm to twelve am with massive drink specials as well as the soothing sounds of local band sensation Busted Stuff.  I plan on getting demolished as an homage to the book, so stop out and get loaded with me!  Everyone’s Irish on St. Patty’s Day, so bring your drinking shoes!  In the mean time, enjoy the review and I’ll see you all tomorrow,

Tom Waters

Like A Bridge Over Drunken Waters: Michael Bly at The Hidden Shamrock

It’s Wednesday on a day that I thought I had off and I’m mad as hell and ready to drink whiskey. I roll into the parking lot of the Hidden Shamrock on Transit before Broadway at 9 p.m. and Marinara Mike comes cruising in simultaneously. We stopped up to see Michael Bly perform since I know he’s there every Wednesday like clockwork. The cavalry should be arriving directly, so we pop inside and order our first pitcher of Labatt Blue on draft and what should be one in a long succession of Tullamore Dew whiskey. This seems to be my new favorite and you’ve got to hand it to any Irish Bar that stocks not only Jamison, but Tully’s as well. I start a tab because it’s going to be a thirsty night.

I’ve never been to the Shamrock before, but I love Irish bars and walking in, I can tell this is no exception. The interior is gorgeous with green walls, a fine stained wood bar and of course, shamrocks all over the place. There’s a regulation pool table past the bar and not one, but two dart boars. Plus the place is lousy with young, hot blondes. We stake out a spot at an island near the window when Lindsay, Richie and his lovely wife Tracy walk in while I’m chatting it up with Michael Bly and his gorgeous jailbait girlfriend Becky. I’m kidding. I find out she’s 24 but she doesn’t look a day over 17, which is fantastic. Then we commence to do some drinking.

I grab a vodka and tea for Lindsay and then shovel some free nachos into my mouth. They just so happen to be having an employee appreciation Christmas party, so there’s free food everywhere. It feels like free buffets have been springing up in my wake, which is fortunate. I try to get a good pic of Michael Bly schmoozing for one of my web sites and when I go for a second shot, I find that he’s disappeared like Batman. My buddy Alycia Ripley shows looking festive in a green sweater and Rich, Marinara Mike and myself repair outdoors for a smoke. I hit the head and ‘Joy To The World’ comes onto the jukebox. I couldn’t disagree more. I stop over to the bar and grab a shot of Crown Royal with Michael. I chat it up with Becky and a blonde bartender starting her shift with boobs that deserve a neon sign or a blue ribbon.

The lovely and talented Gregg Sansone shows and we’ve got ourselves a partial Bro-deo. Gregg doesn’t drink but he came out to support his buddy Bly. Michael starts his first set of the night and the crowd is loud and rowdy. He performs his third song, ‘Ring Of Fire’ with an acoustic rendition that reminds me of early Simon & Garfunkel. Then he launches into a pitch perfect version of the Beatles’ ‘Norwegian Wood’. We grab a smoke and Mike leads in with Bob Marley’s ‘Redemption Song’. Gregg walks over to sit closer to Mike’s act and I’m unable to go as Lindsay is being moody. After a few minutes I shamble over anyway and shout out ‘I love you, Michael Bly! Have my baby!’ and jackass it up a bit.

Some scary bald man is making out with a blonde and I despise blatant Public Displays Of Affection. Open mouth make out sessions should be reserved for movie theaters, church and the privacy of your own home. Nobody wants to watch some amateur porn movie on a bar stool when they’re trying to get down to some serious drinking, so spare us the image. Mike segways into ‘Squeeze Box’ and we’re feeling increasingly cramped because some A-hole decides to play darts behind us instead of over to the left at the deserted dart board in the corner. Tracy remarks that she’s concerned about getting a stray dart in the head. Alycia is putting her mouth into overdrive talking up Marinara Mike about her current book, her life, and her upcoming books. Mike is shaking his head and agreeing like a good little bitch.

Bly sings a phenomenal version of ’Rocket Man’ and then ’You Had A Bad Day’, which I can totally relate to on many levels. Gregg notes that there’s a preponderance of punks with white baseball caps and he’s right. Around eleven pm, the bar becomes a little bit ghetto and a lot less rock and roll. Becky says goodbye and Mike sings a rousing version of ’When Doves Cry’. I’m old enough to remember when that song came out! I can relate on a generational level! I should, as I’m 31 and Mike is within that vicinity although I’ve been sworn to secrecy as to his exact age. He finishes his first set and we do another round of Crown. Lindsay is tired, I’m soused, Rich and Tracy crash the party, Gregg says his goodbyes, Alycia keeps selling Marinara Mike and the boys with the white baseball caps continue to try and exude something that resembles thugness. We pop out the door and head out to our cars going our separate ways. The holidays are a living hell but it’s nice to know that we can find sanctuary in an Irish paradise like the Hidden Shamrock with a diverse and talented blend of music from a man like Michael Bly. I’m feeling it the next day but it didn’t matter a bit when we went out. I’m not sure if Bly’s Irish but he certainly drinks like it.

Where the hell was my sweet Molly Malone?

Tom ’Tully’ Waters

When Tom Waters isn’t engaged in the art of competitive drinking, he’s updating his site (www.tomfoolery4.wordpress.com) and tying up promotional loose ends for his next book (If They Can’t Take a Joke) and his next book launch (April).

    

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