Archive for the ‘the pissed off world of uncle hal’ Category

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Monday Big Words Update! Week 101 on stands/CHS Workshop Tomorrow/Talking Leaves THIS Thursday!

November 4, 2008

So…..

The Monsters Of Verse are full steam ahead and this crazy rig isn’t going to let up until at least the beginning of May.  Once the calendar year closes, we’ll be investing a great deal of time and energy into booking additional events, new venues and bigger appearances from February through May.  For now, though, we’ve got plenty to keep our hands full with the events we’ve got and new engagements keep popping up without us even trying!

Moving on, Night Life magazine assaults the Buffalo/Toronto market today with a Big Words edition of ‘Unenjoyment’, a stoical look at how my life would play out after Gamestop wrongfully terminated me so that they could promote a total incompetent racist drug addict into one of their new stores in the Buffalo market.  Scoop up a copy while it’s hot!  If you were on the free newsletter list (which you can subscribe to by emailing bigwordsmailbag@yahoo.com with ‘subscribe’ in the subject heading), you got to see it first over three weeks ago.  If not, now’s your chance to read it in Night Life.  With 70,000 copies rolling off the presses every single week all over the Greater Buffalo/Niagara area, there are plenty of bars, restaurants and pizzerias where you can read all about it!

Tomorrow, I’ll be making a return trip to the hallowed halls of Clarence Central High School to teach my first writing workshop to the kids in the Poetry Club, the staff at Chrysalis, the on-site literary magazine (which has grown by leaps and bounds since I graduated in ’93), and a few other stragglers who got the exclusive invite from Ms. Foster and Kevin Starr.  You can hear the entire event some time later this week when it pops up on Think Twice Radio’s Monsters Of Verse site. 

This Thursday, the Monsters Of Verse kick off their second scheduled appearance/reading/signing at Talking Leaves on Main St. (near Bailey) at 6 p.m.   Jonathan (the owner proprietor of both locations) has been extremely supportive and helpful with all of my books for the last seven years, so bringing the crew out for another hoorah was a no brainer.  You can check out his listing/brief synopsis of the book over on Talking Leaves’ official site at:

http://www.tleavesbooks.com/watersplus.htm

Jr Finlayson, Carrie Gardner and myself will be reading selections from our newest poetry collections in fifteen minute blocks (so we have time to schmooze/hawk some books before the store closes at 8 pm sharp).  I don’t like to hold up employees at the locations where we have events scheduled near close, so please show up on time, bring plenty of friends (and cold hard cash!) and feel free to join us out afterwards!

I also pounded out two new graphic novel reviews for my editor Thom Young over at www.comicsbulletin.com.  One of the two should be going up this Wednesday, when they premiere their graphic novel reviews on the site.  I’ve been pretty negligent with them lately and I get neurotic when I’m not taking full advantage of every media stream I’m plugged into, so I’ll be focusing my creative efforts (with what diminishing free time I have) on getting a few more reviews backlogged for Mr. Young.

I’m not sure if there will be a new Big Words One Man Mobile Unit episodes this week, but we’ll see what happens.  This week is pretty hectic and I’m still reeling from my molar extraction.  I feel guilty for loafing even for a day or two, but some bed/couch rest wouldn’t be the worst idea in the world.  We’ll see what happens.  If Uncle Hal stiffs again (which is becoming an increasingly more common occurance lately), maybe I’ll set something up on Wednesday with somebody else. 

And DON’T FORGET TO VOTE MCCAIN/PALIN ON ELECTION DAY, Tuesday, November 4th!  The Republican party needs all the support we can muster, so make the time, hit the polls and make your voice heard!  Our nations economy and global stance for the next four years depend upon it.  Don’t let the Spendocrats win this one, even if our last contender turned into a bumbling moron.  Who knows, maybe W. can find gainful seasonal employment with the soulless jackasses currently running Gamestop into the ground?  He’s got half a brain, and that appears to be qualification enough lately….

Have a great week and see you out, about and in print in Buffalo!

Vote Republican!,

Tom Waters

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Breathing Room Volume 2 complete, first 2 batman reviews down

July 16, 2008

     After a day of writing, formatting, and overall creative overdrive, Breathing Room volume 2: rhymes & relics is done.  Now that both volumes are complete, now I need to embark on the slow, painful process of learning the desktop publishing ethic  (through lulu.com), working on headers & footers and making sure that the spelling and placement are correct.  Carrie Gardner (my esteemed and appointed Editor in Chief for the project) was kind enough to priority mail her corrections for the first collection (along with a knockout intro) yesterday.  This is the first (and only time) that I’ll be working on the typesettting and layout to not one, but two books simultaneously.  After 325 odd pages of poems, I’m finally ready to take a break.

     And in light of that, two of the Batman reviews are up and at play online.  Buffalo Rising (online) posted my review for The Killing Joke deluxe 20th anniversary edition along with Batman: Jekkyl & Hyde.  You’re welcome to read both over at:

www.buffalorising.com

     I’ll be spending the better part of this afternoon co-hosting the historic 60th episode of the Pissed Off World Of Uncle Hal out in the sunny Burbank studios of Uncle Hal/Harpo Productions in California today.  The second that the episode is up I’ll let you know.  Much like the ‘I’m not even supposed to be here today’ mantra to Clerks, I don’t even have a book to promote!  Yet…..

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The Pissed Off World Of Uncle Hal Episode 58! Teabag & Tennile, Balloon Priest, Doe A Deer and More!

May 1, 2008

     After four hours of high pressure comedy at Uncle Hal studios, we’ve got another four star episode!  I thought I was a little rusty, Hal was at the top of his game and I’m still laughing so hard it hurts at some of the stuff we said.  You’re not going to believe some of the bits we riffed with and you’ll really have to hear it to believe it.  If this episode doesn’t get us both of us strung up from a telephone pole, nothing will.  Hal assures me that Episode 58 should be up online sometime tonight or tomorrow (Thursday), so click on over and check back often at:

www.powunclehal.com

    Find out why over 4,000 people download Uncle Hal onto their Ipods every single month.   I didn’t even have anything to promote, but it was fun just to be back on the show.  Hal and I hit such a comedic zietgeist every time that I can’t resist being on the show just for the hell of it.  Listen to the episode, find out what the ‘Teabag & Tenille’ reference is all about and email your comments to:

unclehal@powunclehal.com

-or phone your opinion in at:

315-849-2593

-Thanks again to Hal for another great show.  Appearing as a guest on the show is the easy part and he spends countless man hours finding sound clips, news items, writing the Happy Ending and tirelessly editing and producing the show.  The professional end product for every episode is a testement to just how much time he invests in it.  A disclaimer, though: If you’re easily offended, mildly offended or occassionally offended by cringe comedy, Don Rickles-style comedy, or if you’ve ever taken any offense at anything in your life, don’t listen.  If you’ve got a twisted sense of humor and it takes a lot to rub you the wrong way, you’re in for one hell of a trip.   

 

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Monday Big Words Update! Week 74 on stands, Think Twice Radio Gig Booked with Susan Marie

April 21, 2008

     The first stretch of the last of the recycled archival material rolls out today in Night Life with part one of ‘Prometheus Packs A Zippo’, an autobiographical tell-all that brings most readers up to the near-present day on where the rest of my life has gone.  Grab it while it’s on stands.

     I was a busy little bee this weekend, penning another new rant (‘Double Barrel Diplomacy’) about the Canadian Invasion in Buffalo, tinkering on a new blog for the YourHub site (‘Love Letter To Lancaster’) that I trimmed down to 600 words afterwards for a shot at a My View column and then covering Riley Street Station for an upcoming Gusto Club Watch bar review.  A very productive weekend, writing wise.  Since I’m going on vacation in about three weeks, I’m trying to get as many bar reviews in as I can so that there’s no lapse in my regularly scheduled publication frequency in Gusto.  The extra paychecks don’t hurt, either.  After my third bar review this Thursday, I’ll be posting pics from all three assignments up on the YourHub site for a sneak peak at the venues before they hit print publication.  That address (again) is:

http://buffalo.yourhub.com/~tomwaters

     And last but not least, I’ll be doing a long overdue guest spot on Think Twice Radio with Susan Marie.  We were originally going to do an interview in July and it just got away from us, so I’ll be heading into the studio late in May.  The web site (for your curiosity/edification) is www.thinktwiceradio.com.  From what she says, the site is up to something like 1,000 hits a day, so that’s some solid exposure.  I’m still beyond psyched about heading back to the Uncle Hal studios this Thursday, but Think Twice should be a hell of a lot of fun, too.  That’s all I’ve got for you for this week.  Make sure to hop on over to YourHub sometime on Friday afternoon.  Cheers,

Tom Waters

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Uncle Hal Reunion Imminent! Special Interest Groups Express Extreme Dislike and Disdain!

April 17, 2008

A summit was reached today and Hal has agreed (against his better judgement) to let me back onto the show sometime next week.  You can expect to hear the episode in roughly two week’s time.  You can also expect biting news, off-color comments that are guarenteed to offend, and a back-and-forth chemistry that puts Reiner and Brooks to shame.  My buddy Brendan was going to post a link to one of the historic episodes, but found that it was removed from the site.  How badly did I piss some special interest group off to make that happen?  For a show that prides itself on pushing the envelope, I’m honored that we pushed it until it spontaneously combusted.  You’re definitely not going to miss the return visit.  I’ll let you know when it’s up and running.  In the mean time, you can catch up on some recent episodes and get a feel for the bombastic nature of the show by clicking over to:

www.powunclehal.com

-Plugola!

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The Pissed Off World Of Uncle Hal Episode 35: Has it been five guest spots already?/Buffalo News My View rant yesterday…

June 7, 2007

After another day at the Uncle Hal studio (reaching the coveted five timer’s club), Episode 35 of The Pissed Off World Of Uncle Hal is a wrap, B!  Hal let me off my chain yesterday to run rampant, so we tried to offend the ten percent of the world that wasn’t horrifically mortified from my last appearance (Episode 28 or 29, I believe).  Blind kids, pedophiles and bestiality, oh my!  Listen in RIGHT NOW at:

 www.powunclehal.com

We had a riot again yesterday and once again took things too far, so you really should give it a listen.  Hal informed me that for the month of May, the show was downloaded almost 4,000 times!  That’s a big audience.  See why everyone’s listening in at:

www.powunclehal.com

And I found out around midnight last night that the Buffalo News ran my MyView rant about Butch (‘Butch & Tom’) under the byline of ‘I realize I’ve become a chip off the old block’.  They never let me know when the My Views are going in, so I normally find out by accident.  It figures that it had to be the one day out of the week that I didn’t pick up the paper.  The original essay ran a lot longer, and I felt like it lost something in the editing, but initial responses have been pretty positive.  I’ll run the full piece in it’s entirety some time here over the weekend, so check back. 

And this weekend, I’ll be at the Buffalo News Collectible Convention at the Millenium Hotel (on Walden Ave. in Cheektowaga right before the Galleria Mall) from 10-4pm selling and signing copies of the new book, so stop on out!  Now that I’ve got my camera back, I’ll be taking oodles of pictures of the event to post up the YourHub site.  But in the meantime, listen to the new Uncle Hal!

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Monday Big Words Update! Week 27 on stands (?), Uncle Hal this Wednesday!

May 29, 2007

Happy Memorial Day!

Lindsay and I just got back from spending the holiday at her parent’s cottage on Lake Erie and it was a perfect day!  I wanted to stay longer, but I had to get back and punch up the bar review that we covered Saturday for Gregario’s Gator Pub in Alden, not to mention the usual Monday update.  And with a new month around the corner, I wanted to make sure I got my Night Life columns in on time…

Since it’s a holiday Monday, the new issue of Night Life may or may not be on stands today (but definitely by tomorrow at the latest, distribution wise) with ‘Wife Beaters & Rollerbladers’, a categorical rant on how people should behave during the summer without pissing me off.  I spent last week punching up two new columns for the print edition of Big Words and I’m throwing two other previously unpublished rants in for the month of June.  The list is as follows: ‘Zero Tolerance’ (about my eroding immune system) is going in for week one, ‘Underwear On The Outside Looking In’ (about the difference between comic book geeks and people who simply enjoy comics) is going in for week two, ‘Feedback Distortion’ (regarding reader feedback) hits on week three and ‘A Vacation From My Problems!’ (about what a pain in the ass it is to come home from vacation) is arriving on week four to round out the month.  If you haven’t been picking up Night Life, then you’re already behind the curve.  Don’t miss out on the new stuff because it’s hitting Night Life first! 

And after offending nearly everyone on the planet during my co-hosting spot on Episode 29 of The Pissed Off World Of Uncle Hal, I’ll be going back into the studio after almost two months to take another crack at getting us both lynched!  To listen to any of the archives (or to hear the new episode when it hits this Friday or next Monday), click on over to:

www.powunclehal.com

That’s all I’ve got for today.  I hope you all enjoyed your holiday and I’ll see you in the funny papers,

Tom Waters 

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